Is he the right guy for you?

If you are courting, in a relationship or even dating we ask ourselves 'is this person right for me' at least once in that relationship.

For some it may be hard to figure out. I have been through situations where I had to think hard on this topic. I truly believe committing to the wrong person can lead you down a destructive path.

So today, I'm here to provide some tips at to things to consider in answering this question.

1. Does he/ she encourage you to be a better person?

It is of extreme importance for us to look the fact that our partner doesn't encourage us to become better persons. This is a big red flag and if she do not become better we are essentially getting worse. It is not worth it to be with someone and not grow to your full potential. 

2. Does this person emotionally and financially drain you?

Many relationships that we experience may entail some emotional abusive components as well as financially negative components. I believe that for a relationship to work each person has to give there all. If an individual is emotionally abusive or condescending that is a big red flag to me. Negative behavior no matter what will eventually get you down. It is not worth it let it go!

I also have to speak on the financial aspect as well. Coming from a Caribbean culture it is emphasized greatly that a male should take care of his partner. In many cases a woman who takes care of a man financially is considered a 'fool.'

For this topic, I simply apply the 50/50 rule. In an economy such as this one it is simply not practical for the average man to spend all of his earnings on his partner. I do believe a man should take care of his household but, there still needs to be balance. You cannot be wealthy and he is starving. I also appeal to females that if you see that your man is in financial difficulties you can also help. I do not believe in paying his rent and bills but if he has proven himself to you you can return the favor.

3. Do you see yourself spending the rest of your life with this person?

Is this person the ideal individual you would like to get married to?

Do you two speak of the future?

Do you see yourself having children with this person?

Does this person even want children?

When entering into a more serious relationship your really have to look into the future and analyse if you really see a future with this person. 

4. Do you have similar life goals?

You may as 'what does this have to do with anything?' For me if you are a goal oriented individual it is best to find someone who is the same. It tends to pose a problem if one person sets high standards for themselves whilst/ the other may be lacking ambition. 

Jamaican mothers many times say 'no take up no man wid no ambition.' 

In many cases what may happen is that one partner may end up holding back the other or it simply ends badly.

5. Is your family fond of  him?

For me family is a big part of my life and we have many family events, this being said it would be a deal breaker if family doesn't like you. For me, my family is very friendly so for them not to like you it is a big deal.

Disclaimer: you have to look at the type of family that you have and the reasons that they have for not liking this person. If the reasons are minor and you see yourself being with this person do not stop your relationship for anyone.

6. Your partner is accepting of who you are.

He/ she loves everything about you even the weird parts. This a positive sign as this means the person truly accepts you for who you are and you can truly be who you are around them. This is a must in every lasting relationship. You cannot try to change a person into what you want them to be.

These are just some points to look at but I also must state the importance of following your heart. Don't let anyone stop you from loving that special one.

Yours truly,

Toni-Shae 

For an enquiries and collaborations email me at tonishaepanton@gmail.com

Please note that many pictures and videos posted are not the property of this blog and are merely used for entertainment purposes.

Update: Radio Interview, OOTD and life journey!

Life Journey

For the past month I have been through I slight rough patch. Do you guys know that moment where it feels like nothing is falling into place?
Trust me, it has had me down under for a while. But what keeps me going is the idea of thinking positively. I know this is easier said than done, but at least try it once in a while. Don't keep living the life of sadness. Depression is not easy to get out of. All I can say is always look for the silver lining and think positively.


Radio Interview
Last week I got the opportunity to do an interview. I was super excited because it would be the first time I would be on the radio. But it all took a turn for the worst when in the middle of the interview I made a slight grammatical error. I know I know for some it may have not been a big thing. But for me I felt like I had sunk to the bottom of the ocean. To this day I am still wondering if anyone heard it. *laugh*


OOTD
I made a hand sewn dress!

I finally decided to try it and it came out pretty good. It took me an entire day! It's a pretty simple design but, I am happy with the result.

Congrats to my lovely friend Miss Veronica McMaster, who is Miss Global Jamaica this year!



Life never fails to be interesting!

XOXO

Toni-Shae Panton

How to deal with cheating!

Well I think the picture and the topic pretty much says it all. I will be taking on the topic of cheating today.
For most people you either know of someone who was cheated on or you were cheated on yourself. You see the emotional hurt that comes with it and how it may have even changed a person's outlook on life.

For me this topic is very simple...if you don't love a person just leave, women/men are not a buffet. You can't have a little of everything. I mean if women or men are your weakness have a open relationship.

But what really gets me is the fact that some men or women cheat with everyone who will allow them but when they get cheated on it is the biggest crime ever.

Sadly if you are a person who was cheated a decision has to be made. I'm going to try and list out all the possible options and which best could help you.

1. End the relationship and leave.
2. Instead of being exclusive just have an open relationship.
3. Work through this rough patch- This may include getting counselling and talking about what caused he/she to decide to go outside the relationship.

Everybody I know I only have three options but I could not think of anymore *laughs*

I'm going to explain them to you.
So, if the guy wants to date everyone in the world why not just have an open relationship. I mean you get to date anybody else you like, but you still get to come home to that person everyday. This decision would basically be a win win situation for everybody or most people.

If you feel like you still love this person and you want to work it out get counselling. It may take a while to gain back trust, but if you think the relationship is right do it. But don't get me wrong now, if this person's actions are making you cry everyday no matter what your heart is telling you use your brain and LEAVE.

Finally if you are upset and you can't even stand to see this persons face just leave this relationship. It makes no sense, especially if you look at this person as if you are about to slash their throat at any moment now.

I personally would have either tried to work through it if I really loved the person or just end it all. I am not one for open relationships...I mean girl "ain't nobody got time for that."

Think about your future and love yourself first.

XOXO

Toni-Shae Panton

HOW TO SURVIVE THE SINGLE LIFE!

Hey everyone and to all my lovies from across the world welcome. Today, I am going to come to you with advice on how to survive the single life.

Am I the only one who realizes that everyone is either dating or engaged! It is almost like you are the odd one out if you are single.

So today I am going to give you all tips and some advice on how to survive these trying times. *giggles*

1. Do not spend your days listening to love songs. This is just going to enhance the lonely feeling you are already having and leading you sort of think that if you are single you are not truly living. If you get what I mean.

2. Do not entertain your friends when they are talking about their happyy little relationships. I kow this may sound a little harsh but, hearing of all the happiness in other's relationships will not help you. This will just make you even lonelier.

3. Focus more on yourself instead of spending your days thinking about potential relationships.

Deal with any emotional hurt you gained from previous relationships and think of ways to improve yourself and your life.

4. Do not go back to your ex.

There was a reason you let him or her, do not go back to that bad relationship! You may be feeling a little low in your spirit for now but that does not mean you should go back to crap.

5. Do not lower your standards. If you do, there is a good chance you may end up in a relationship you may regret. Always keep your standards high no matter what and if these guys or girls does not make the cut that means he or she was not right for you.


6. Do not be pressured into a relationship. No matter if your family or friends are almost forcing you to start dating do not do it unless you want to. This is the best time to 'find your back bone and gain your voice'. If you do not want to start dating do not do it!

I hope this helped someone out there and do not forget that you do not need a man or woman to complete you.


XOXO

TONI-SHAE PANTON

WONDERFUL CHRISTMAS!

It's that time of the year again:) It"s Christmas!!

Time to set up the Christmas lights, turn on the oven and get some cooking done. 

Don't know what to do this Christmas here is some advice on having a great Christmas. 

1. Be early for all family events.

2. Dress age appropriately for all events. Do not walk around with you boobs hanging out and butt falling out of our dress to your office's Christmas party.

3. There is no such thing as too much food. Growing up in Jamaica Christmas has always had an abundance of food: Ham, bread pudding and everything else Caribbean. This being said I am not sure if this would be the best time to start dieting. You may end up gaining more weight than anything else.

4. If you don't know the perfect gift to buy please ASK. The thing I can't stand the most around the holidays is a person buying some tacky gift and then saying I thought of you when I was buying it. That just makes it seem like I have some terrible style or something. So please people if you don't know just ask.

5. Christmas decorations are a must, so before you go around inviting visitors ensure that your house is fully decked out for the season.

6. Too much alcohol is never your friend. Please do not walk around for most of he Christmas season drunk because trust me that is not cute.

7. Do not hook up with random people because you're lonely. Christmas is usually a time where you see a lot of persons getting married or hooking up. If you're single like I am please do not fall prey to emotions. You do not want to be that girl to hook up that one time and have the horrible consequences follow you forever.

8. Please remember that everything done in the holidays will follow you through to the new year. God may forgive but people may not so easily.

Find us on Facebook for more photos https://www.facebook.com/JamaicanBeautyBlog

XOXO

Happy Holidays Everyone!

Note- Photos posted are not owned by this blog.

CRAZY GOOD UP AND COMING TALENTS!

GOOD MORNING MY BEAUTIES :)
I don't know if you have been keeping up with the Jamaican music scene later, I know I was not really before until I came across these two talents.
One of them you may already know, her name is Samantha J. She is a sixteen year old artist which you may know for her son "tight up skirt."

This was made a remix for Jamaican artist Red Rat's song "tight up skirt" made in the 1990's.

I am not even going to joke she is a great artist especially, just being 16. But, would I want to be the parent of 16 year old  singing that she is the girl in the tight up skirt...probably not. I am going to give her props where they are due she is a great artist and I wish her best of luck.

Our other talent is a Jamaican producer from CRF BEATZ known as Rovaunie. He is a gospel producer but, I do think he has places to go. He provides a new and edgy look to the Jamaican gospel scene. 

Here are a free samples of some of his work.

https://soundcloud.com/crf-beatz

Check him out on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/crfadvocate8701

Don't forget to support team Jamaica everyone and find me on Facebook  https://www.facebook.com/JamaicanBeautyBlog

XOXO

TONI-SHAE :*

THE BEST AND THE WORST OF HALLOWEEN :)

Halloween is officially over and you know with halloween comes costumes!

Some costumes were great and others were terrible tragic, so I am here to show you the best and worst of halloween. I hope you don't get nightmares :)

Miley was dressed as Lil' Kim.

Ellen Degeneres was dressed up as Nicki Minaj

Heidi Klum dressed as an old lady.

With halloween over let the countdown to christmas begin!

XOXO

TONI-SHAE

The beautiful life:)

Today is going to be a photo inspiration day. Yay!!  *laughs*
I don't know about you but for me sometimes these pictures give me that extra push in my life. It makes me want to do my best and in some way ensure I get to that point of success. I hope this can give you that push too and I dropped some fashionable randoms in there. :)

For more photos check out our facebook page https://www.facebook.com/JamaicanBeautyBlog


ALL MY GOSPEL JAMAICAN MUSIC LOVERS OUT THERE CHECK OUT
https://www.facebook.com/crfadvocate8701  AND ALSO https://soundcloud.com/crf-beatz

TELL ME YOUR FEEDBACK

XOXO

TONI-SHAE

GET THAT MONEY!

I have been hearing all over so many beautiful girls saying that if school fails just marry well. Lets just think about it, haven't we all made a couple jokes or too about it...I know I have.

Now everyone out there is looking for a sugar daddy.
I am not here to bash all of those girls out there who like having their sugar daddies because that is just what they like.
But before you engage in these relationships here are somethings you should know.

1. Whoever you are dating ensure you actually like them for them and not their money because trust me rich men can spot a gold digger from 5 miles away. Apart from what people think they are not stupid and they will sleep with you but hardly ever marry you.
2. Don't go around trying to use people because karma is a heck of a thing. I am sure if what you did came back to you wouldn't like it.
3. Ensure that you can actually support yourself if this man leaves you.I have seen too many people out there that after the man leaves them they fall flat on their faces. First they were wearing Prada now they can barely afford Old Navy.

And for all of those people killing relationships out there, age is not a big deal I totally believe love has no specific age barrier or limit, so if you want him go get him. Do not listen to all the negativity if you feel it is right go get him!

XOXO

TONI-SHAE

FIND US ON FACEBOOK https://www.facebook.com/JamaicanBeautyBlog

AUTUMN FASHION!

The seasons are changing which means we are getting one season closer to Christmas *happy dance*
Even though the temperature does not really change drastically in Jamaica, I just still like to look at some great autumn looks.
So here are some outfit ideas that would be great for autumn!

Have a good hump day everyone!

XOXO

TONI-SHAE